Tan tan tatan... tan tan tatan...
It was the marching sound of college graduation. 31 May 2017, my second child, my oldest daughter is graduating from college. And I think and I see I was the happiest parent in the hall. Yehey! Clap! Clap! Clap!
I gave her solid deadlines (same deadlines I gave to my oldest child when he graduated in 2012).
"Thirty days from graduation dapat may trabaho ka na. Thirty days mula nag-umpisa ka magtrabaho, di na kita bibigyan ng allowance... kahit singkong duling."
("Thirty days from graduation, you should have a job. Thirty days from your first day of work, I will not give you money anymore.)
saying this while heartily smiling from ear to ear and adding,
"Assumption is that job provided you your first monthly salary and you should be able to budget it at least until the next payday."
I heard some friends tell me, I'm tough. And the kid should be given time to rest as they had lots of sleepless nights finishing school requirements and thesis and say you.
My answer is that's tough love!
"If meron mang may karapatang magpahinga sa bahay na ito ay walang iba kundi si Tatay. Kasi 10 years old pa lang siya e nagta-trabaho na"
( If there is someone in this household who should go to vacation and rest is no other than my father because he has been working since he was 10 who is now 71 years old and still working)
My reasoning - I will not always be here to provide financially. Ever since my motto in raising my children, being a single mom, is that I'm preparing them everyday as if I will die tomorrow. Yup! that is how morbid I am. I actually talk about death as if it was summer time. Hehehe!
But seriously, there is no better time to teach our children to handle their finances than when they have a taste of their hard earned money. I told my daughter to open a separate savings account where she will deposit the amount she likes to save. And when that amount gets into that savings account, she should forget about it -- as if she spent it already and it's gone. That way you are tricking your brain that you don't have any more money. Believe me, you can always trick yourself.
And yes, she did get a job offersheet within 30 days from graduation and got her first salary after. Mind you, she's stingy, cooking food for baon which she never did when she was in college because I give the allowance. Hahaha! But at least, the deadlines were met.
Dear co-parents, do not be afraid to stretch your children more than a bit. Remember, they will be on their own in time. It is our obligation to prepare them become good adults.
Len C is a proud mother of 3 lovely kids, has more than a decade experience in the BPO industry, with MA units major in Industrial-Organizational Psychology at the Ateneo de Manila University.
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